Today I feel Angry (red).
I found out a three hour class I was supposed to be picking up isn’t going to open. This means I have less teaching hours after my full time job becomes hourly. The school is still going to find ways to fill that gap and keep finding classes for me… but it means maybe another month of the feeling that my job isn’t stable. This isn’t what I’m angry about.
What I’m angry about is that I’ve been working hard to get a stable job for a long time, and have been putting other parts of my life on hold until that magical day happens. Of course it’s a bad idea to enroll in language classes if you aren’t sure you can pay your rent, but there are other possible ways to learn a language. They are more work, so I’ve been avoiding them… “My job should be stable in two months, that small wait won’t make a difference.” is adding up to a big difference.
I won’t buy a fish tank till things are stable… this one I still have to wait on because I would die inside if I had to let fish die because I couldn’t afford them anymore. Getting a new computer…. it would be nice, but this one still mostly works… ish.
Anyway, tired of things in life feeling like they are on hold… so I’m going to move forward… I’m already taking time to write this blog and my book no matter what. Time to do a few more things no matter what… hopefully that what isn’t I die of exhaustion.